Valentine’s Day: Single or Not, Avoid These 10 False Expectations!

Meh, Valentine’s day is about 2 weeks around the corner and I couldn’t care less. (Or could I? hmm) If you’re reading this, then you probably have the assumption that I am a bitter woman venting about this horrid holiday because I have no one to play tonsil hockey with – and this just isn’t true because I love Valentine’s Day. Why? Because I get to laugh at all the girls who get their hopes too high on the day where men are obligated to do/buy something for them. It also comforts me that a bunch of single people are inhaling ice cream on the sofa with their unmatched socks like no ones watching – because, well, no one is. *sigh*  I mean, duh, if you don’t get flowers and chocolate on Valentine’s Day, then you are obviously single, pathetic, lonely and tragically unloved. We can thank TV commercials and the aisles of candy and teddy bears that have “I love you” plastered all over them for that.

On a brighter note, here are some of the realities of Valentine’s Day, in other words, what the media says it should be like, and how it actually is. Because, let’s face it, all it is, is a day that men are expected to go all out for you, but little do you know they absolutely hate it deep down and can’t wait for it to be February 15th so they can be an asshole again. Ooooh, I am starting to sound bitter again – let’s get to the list:

1. Rose Petal Art


Valentines Day expectation roses romantic


Yeah, good luck with finding someone who will go through all that work. If you’re single, you know your floor is going to stay bare, but if you aren’t, expect it to be, because sorting those roses are way too much work for a guy. LOL.


2. A Surprise?! For me?! Oh….Wait.


valentines day heart surprise hidden


If he has his hand(s) behind his back, just assume he is in pain. Like I said, never get your hopes up darlings.

unhappy man suffering from backache at home

3. Romantic Kissing




If you want any passion like scenes from “The Notebook“, get it organically, not artificially…for example:

4. Romantic Bedroom Set Up




He ain’t decorating his bed unless he REALLY effed up. So just expect this:

Messy Bedroom Reality

5. Packaging




Guys don’t see the significance in wrapping, creativity, and special touches when it comes to giving gifts. Just expect these on your porch…late….on February 21st .

Steve Case

6. Chocolate



The Romantic


If you’re reading this, you’re likely single. It’s okay, hand feed yourself. But please don’t do it on the kitchen floor.

jenna marbles gif chocolate feelings

7. Romantic Baths


Henderson Park


Again, expect a cold shower, with, or without bae. Who got their hopes up? Not you, darling!

8. Cuddling




Just like every night, you’ll be laying there, contemplating life. Not cuddling. Most people won’t be – it’s OK!

9. Love Notes


Romantic Getaway


This is actually a lot of work for a guy to do, so don’t be disappointed. It probably took him 6 months to plan this out.

Link System

10. Romantic Dinner




A romantic dinner isn’t exactly unrealistic….unless you’re single. The struggle is real.

Ahhhhh, the joys of hearing all the girls with their sunshiney smiles and sunshiney dresses prance around waiting to be treated like a princess even though they are prissy and only have the sense of entitlement. The truth is, what he does the other 364 days is what really counts.

sheldon penny gif chocolate big bang theory

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Hello! My name is Crystal Kelley. I have a love for writing to express my thoughts on a variety of topics. I am always inspired by new things, therefore, what I will write about next is pleasantly unpredictable. I enjoy singing, drawing, playing piano, photography and my dog. Oh, and glitter really does run through my veins.

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